Friday Humor

Hand Job

grabbing-hand-psd19419

So it appears some brainiac at the University of Utah has developed a theory surmising that “human hands may have evolved their unique shape in order to better punch the living daylights out of competitors.”

The hand shape essentially turns “this relatively delicate musculoskeletal system into an effective club,” said study co-author David Carrier, an evolutionary biologist at the University of Utah. 

This isn’t the first time Carrier has argued that humans evolved to fight. Last year he published research suggesting that humans became bipedal to better land crushing blows.

“If you stop and look at what we know about the other species, we’re a relatively violent group of mammals,” Carrier told LiveScience.   SOURCE  

 

Seriously?  What tree branch did this Neanderthal swing from?   We may be a violent group of mammals but we have priorities too and hands serve our self-pleasuring interests first and foremost.  Do these look like the hands that want to club people?

groping IIIgroping IIgroping I

It could be argued that the hand of Michael Jackson might on occasion be viewed as a club euphemism as he sang his hit, “Beat It!”  But we all know what was going on here.

beat it

 

This relatively delicate musculoskeletal system is also capable of groping other body parts to pleasure ourselves by but proper decorum prevents me from providing images of this.

7 responses to “Friday Humor

  1. Thank you for covering this extremely important bit of scientific research. And you did it without a grant. Awesome.

  2. Loved it ! Finally someone said it: the human hand evolved to hold penises. I’m sure glad I’ve got two (hands that is), That way pee-pee never dribbles down my leg.

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